I've been seeing a bunch of people in the credits of the really big NG collabs (I'm not a big fan of the whole "reanimated" concept or any of the really big themed collabs that exist) and... despite my emotions causing vague stuff to happen to me whenever I see it, I'm okay with not wanting to be a part of any collab, big or small, considering how no one cares about my stuff (even though I haven't uploaded my old stuff yet). I'm also okay with no one seeing my stuff because I don't like being popular or everyone else complaining about not being popular and not shutting up about... basically everything

No one's going to like my stuff anyway, and I honestly don't like it when people actually like my stuff on social media because I'm extremely paranoid that the people who give them are either bots or accounts that only exist to blindly like everything,,, I just don't want the attention, big or small

I just want to be alone and not follow everyone/have no one follow me just to spite the whole concept of popularity... why does everything I do have to be in spite of everyone

EDIT: wow I need to stop fragmenting my thoughts by leaving sentences unfinished without realizing it until after the fact. Also, I really don't want to do collaborations or commissions/art trades/whatever because literally everything I haven't interacted with (and some popular media I have interacted with recently but am tired of seeing everywhere) makes me uncomfortable... in other words, fanart in general

EDIT 2: Point is, I don't care if I ever get scouted or frontpaged or featured briefly anywhere on this site. Probably not going to like it, either.